I've always wondered about the power of the phrase 'off the record.' You see it in movies and TV all the time. The interviewee leans in a little more discretely and says 'off the record, I never bathe without bubble bath.'

But, they just said that to a journalist. Does that phrase disallow the reporter from uttering that truth to another living soul? Is it now a secret that the two share forever, binding them together through their mutual inability to let the world know what is really happening?

I want to be interviewed and just drop an off-the-record phrase every once in a while. Just to keep him on his toes and to make the interviewer feel special. And if they planned on publishing an audio recording of it, they'll have a lot of unnecessary editing work to do.

The best would be to do it on live TV. "Well, I try to maintain a healthy balance between it all, but off the record" -- the screen goes black -- when the show comes back there is a donkey on stage and everyone is drinking milk. In hatred.