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Reasons Why According to Movies, There is a 99% Chance I Will Not See My 25th Birthday
By: Dan


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As you may or may not know, I will be relocating in the near future from LA to New York. As a film buff, I have to be completely honest in saying that I am pants shittingly terrified if my time there will be anything like it is in the movies. Lucky for you I have channeled this ego crippling fear into a more creative outlet and without further hesitation I present you with "Reasons why according to movies there is a 99% chance I will not see my 25th birthday."

dangers of New York

So, if you feel inclined to give me a goodbye gift before my departure here is a list of approved items:
- Floaties
- Fire retardant body armor
- Capsule of cyanide
- Hope

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