Dear Reader,

I had a painful realization earlier this afternoon.
That I have seen the last 7 films made by Roland Emerich. To make matters worse, Roland Emerich has had only 8 nationally distributed films in his career. Only fortune has made it so that I have not seen Universal Soldier.

To all in the world who have any discernable taste, I owe you my most heartfelt apologies.
To anyone who still dreams of a film future where our movies have any merit, I beseech your forgiveness.
To those who will have to suffer the inhuman caricatures within yet another Emerich film, I can not meet your gaze.

To make matters worse, I saw this film on opening weekend. I was confused... lost... somehow every part of me knew what I was doing was wrong, but I continued.
I have paid the ultimate price.
I have suffered yet another Emerich film and I am stupider for it.

I can't explain how this has happened to me. I only know that it has.
Words are not enough to explain how bad 2012 is. No apology is meaningful enough to undo what I have done.

By the evidence, it would seem there can be no speculation other than that I must be a mouth-drooling fan of Roland Emerich.
In actuality, I would spit on his shoes if I ever met him. But I have failed myself.
And I have failed you.

Don't make the same mistake I did. Do not go see 2012.

Sincerely,
Steven Topham